pseudopodium: Amazon stretchmarks

Amazon stretchmarks: If you decide to check out The Complete Films of Buster Keaton, you'll receive a specially tailored message that

Our auction sellers recommend:
NEW BUSTIER 42D (Current bid: $20.50)

The scary thing is they were able to figure out that I wear a 42D....

Yeah, I know the whole Web is getting into the Amazon Recommendation game, but by sacred Hera's bracelets mine are still the best:

You requested: Early Girls, Vol. 1 (Ace Records girl groups collection)
Our auction sellers recommend:
28" Long Carved Wood Cookie Board (Current bid: $34.99)

Doug Asherman is heartened by Amazon's fight against traditional gender roles:

When I looked up Once Upon A Time In China at the Amazon web site, auction recommendations included a cup and saucer and the hardcover edition of The Joy Luck Club. Man, did you ever feel like someone really has your number?

In the Company of Mormon:

The titles below are particularly popular with customers from Brigham Young University.
1. HTML 4 for the World Wide Web: Visual QuickStart Guide
2. Tainted Truth; The Manipulation of Fact in America
3. Star Wars Episode I: The Phantom Menace (Darth Maul Cover)
4. Asking the Right Questions : A Guide to Critical Thinking
5. Film Scheduling : Or, How Long Will It Take to Shoot Your Movie?
6. The Millionaire Next Door : The Surprising Secrets of America's Wealthy
7. Mary Parker Follett : Prophet of Management
8. Film Director's Team
9. The Act of Marriage : The Beauty of Sexual Love

The titles below are particularly popular with customers from West Sacramento, CA.
1. Songs From Ally McBeal Featuring Vonda Shepard

The titles below are particularly popular with customers from Charities & Nonprofit.
1. Live Now Age Later : Proven Ways to Slow Down the Clock

As if they weren't in enough trouble, Beth Rust tells us that Amazon is now competing with drivers-ed films and Variety box-office predictions:

The link is to Dead Men Do Tell Tales, one of my favorite forensic-anthropologist-memoirs books. The auction suggestions that came up?

Skid Resistance of Highway Pavements
Fight Club poster (Brad Pitt)

Dedicated consumer and Mistress of Morbidity Beth Rust uncovers evidence of previously unsuspected information sharing between Amazon and DoubleClick:

They know too much about me... I just looked up a new Feng Shui book in Amazon - you know, the "put a green glass bowl in the southwest corner of your office to encourage the flow of energy" stuff - and the "Auctions" cross-reference that showed up was:
POISON & DRUG Labels from 1910's-1920's: LOT of 10 (Current bid: $8.99)

The death wish of Amazon Books & Garden Tools has swollen past themselves and their investors to the point of sending subliminal suicidal messages to their own customers! Witness the back of this ungainly plastic travel mug mailed to the Kokonino household as a "gift":

	absurd, then there is NO hope

	die tomorrow.

Speaking of consumption, Beth Rust forwards the following list of shopping ideas from Amazon:


	See more by the authors
		all books by Chilled The Fresh
		all books by Frozen Horse
		all books by Ass Meat Research Group

Ass Meat Research Group Update

Adding immeasurably to my cred as a "literary blogger," Aaron Mandel has sent me a scoop. And not just any scoop — a scoop of edible offals!

Several years ago it was your webpage that alerted me to the existence of contemporary authors Ass Meat Research Group, Chilled The Fresh and Frozen Horse.
If you have not been keeping tabs on the gentlemen or ladies in question, I can inform you that when I checked sometime in 2003, I found that Amazon had miscredited all their works to some boring old single entity called "The Fresh, Chilled and Frozen Horse and Ass Meat Research Group".
However, it seems that Ass Meat Research Group, at least, is back to the literary world, now collaborating with Czech poet-manque Sheep The Edible Offals of Bovi.

I see Bloo the Meat and Preserved the Salted have also been active:

Still no reprints of Rosin the Bow or Preserved Fish, however. I blame copyright extensions.

The imaginary is not formed in opposition to reality as its denial or compensation; it grows among signs, from book to book

We thank Dr. Josh Lukin for recommending The Prison and the American Imagination and related reading:

The Prison and the American Imagination offers a passionate and haunting critique of the very idea of solitude in American life. Customers Who Bought This Item Also Bought: Wiley CPA Exam Review 2012, Financial Accounting and Reporting by O. Ray Whittington Paperback $40.95

Smith's book is remarkably inventive and wide-ranging with its close interweaving of literature and history, its refusal to rely slavishly on Foucault, its close reading, and its refreshingly lucid style. All the information you need to master the computerized CPA exam!

Responses

accelerated depreciation on my debt to society?

Bloo... Meat?

'Bestiaire' starring Lion, Goat and Dead Hen (2012) $20.27 DVD

Responses

Je souhaite dans ma maison:
Un lion rugissant sa raison,
Une chèvre, qui mange de toute sorte
Et dort en paix, comme une poule morte.

CONSUMER ALERT: We watched this last night, and neither Goat nor Dead Hen appear! Dead Duck and Zebra do OK jobs, I guess, but anyone who buys this hoping to enjoy another signature turn by Dead Hen or Goat will be very disappointed!

Copyright to contributed work and quoted correspondence remains with the original authors.
Public domain work remains in the public domain.
All other material: Copyright 2024 Ray Davis.